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How to Quit Toxic Dopamine Hits

Entrepreneurs...

Are you tired of waking up on Monday mornings, regretting the decisions you made over the weekend?

Do you find yourself turning to porn for relief when stressed out or overwhelmed?

Are you frustrated with constantly giving in to unhealthy junk food, knowing it's not good for you?

If you answered yes, this is the episode for you.

It has been 574 days since I quit drinking alcohol and over 12 months since I last watched porn.

I no longer allow myself to mindlessly scroll on social media, and I am very conscious and aware of what I consume on a daily basis.

By eliminating toxic dopamine hits, I no longer wake up with hangovers, experience brain fog, lack motivation, or feel unexcited about the direction my life is heading. It has been a mental, physical, and spiritual breakthrough for both my personal and business life. I am incredibly grateful for shifting my values and beliefs when I did because I know it will have a compounding effect on the rest of my life.

In today's blog, I will identify toxic dopamine hits that people often give in to, share the framework I've used to eliminate them, and discuss seven benefits I've experienced since removing them from my life.

What is a toxic dopamine hit?

In order to identify them, we must first understand what they are. A toxic dopamine are "behaviors that provide immediate pleasure or satisfaction but can lead to detrimental effects on mental health, well-being, and overall life balance." These behaviors are typically associated with addictive or compulsive patterns that may interfere with a person's ability to lead a healthy and fulfilling life.

Some examples of these behaviors include:

  1. Seeking validation on social media
  2. Spending excessive time on screens
  3. Binge-watching TV shows
  4. Engaging in unhealthy eating habits
  5. Substance abuse
  6. Compulsive shopping

If you are currently listening to this podcast, it is likely that you are or want to prioritize your mental health, well-being, and life balance. Therefore, it is evident that toxic dopamine hits will distract us from designing a life that aligns with our core values, goals, and interests.

So, what do we need to do? We must eliminate these behaviors at all costs.

How do we get rid of them?

So the million dollar question, how do we get rid of them for good? I leaned into James Clear, author of Atomic Habits for to pull inspiration and create an easy six step framework that I’ve used and hopefully you too can use yourself. I am going to use wanting to eliminate alcohol as an example since I’ve been through this process before.

Step 1: Identify the Cue

We need to clearly identify the cue or trigger that initiates the bad habit. This could be a specific situation, emotional state, or time of day. Example: Being mentally drained after a long day.

Step 2: Recognize the Craving

Understand the craving or desire that follows the cue. This is the emotional or mental state that drives you to perform the habit. Example: Wanting to feel relieved, relaxed and stress-free.

Step 3: Isolate the Routine

Pinpoint the specific behavior or routine that constitutes the bad habit. What action do you take in response to the craving? Example: Walking to the fridge to grab a cold beer.

Step 4: Replace with a Positive Behavior

Identify a positive habit or behavior that can replace the negative one but still addresses the underlying craving. Choose something that provides a similar reward. Example: Get in a 30 min workout to reset the mind and body.

Step 5: Audit Your Environments

Pay close to attention to the people or environments that lead you to wanting to cave to the unwanted habits. Keep your distance or completely take yourself out of these situations to avoid temptation. Example: Creating boundaries with friends that only want to party on the weekends and not allowing myself to step foot into a bar or club past 8pm.

Step 6: Repeat and Reinforce

Consistently repeat the positive habit, reinforcing the new neural pathways. Habits are strengthened through repetition, so aim for consistency. Example:  Taking it one day at a time and trusting the process of eliminating alcohol from my life.

Easier said then done? Yes but can this framework be used towards any toxic dopamine hit or unwanted habit, absolutely.

7 Benefits Since Eliminating Toxic Dopamine

Now you may be thinking... "Okay, so I understand that these unhealthy dopamine hits may be a distraction, but what will I get in return if I remove them from my life?"

That's a great question, and knowing the ripple effect might inspire and motivate you even more to get rid of them.

For me personally, cutting them out has brought seven specific benefits:

  1. Enhanced focus and concentration: I can easily drop into focus and fully concentrate on tasks at hand without my mind wandering. This has tremendously increased my productivity and output.
  2. Better sleep: I prioritize getting enough sleep because it sets the tone for my day. By avoiding late nights and substances that disrupt my sleep quality, I consistently get great sleep. Gone are the days of trying to function on only five hours of sleep. Thanks to my Eight Sleep Mattress, my sleep quality consistently scores over 90, regardless of the day of the week.
  3. Emotional stability: Without relying on toxic dopamine hits to escape unwanted emotions or feelings, I have learned to sit with, see, and understand them. This has improved my ability to handle and respond to my emotions rather than react. It has made both my personal and business life easier and more graceful. What used to completely derail my day is now just a minor speed bump.
  4. Peak physical health: Our bodies are our vehicles, and how we treat them directly affects how we feel and show up in our day. Without hangovers and by consciously choosing healthier options, I am in better physical health. Eliminating alcohol and unhealthy eating habits has prevented me from over consuming calories. I have also made working out a consistent habit, leading me to feel the best I ever have physically.
  5. Increased confidence: Better emotional stability and physical health have naturally boosted my confidence. I know who I am, understand my core values, and have clarity on the life I am building for myself. I am proud to be me and wouldn't trade lives with anyone else. This allows me to hold my head high and feel confident as Bobby Hobert.
  6. More resources: By eliminating toxic dopamine hits, I have gained back time, money, energy, and bandwidth to prioritize other areas of my life. I can now focus on life experiences, friendships, relationships, hobbies, and interests. Previously, many weekends in my late 20s were dedicated to partying, but I have no regrets. Since eliminating toxic dopamine hits, I have essentially gained an additional 48 hours each weekend to design the life I want for myself.
  7. Stronger relationships: When toxic dopamine hits are the only common interest you have with someone, it creates low-vibration friendships. Surrounding myself with people who prioritize their well-being and share similar interests and goals has allowed me to build a community of genuinely aligned individuals. It has also deepened my relationship with Kate, as we both stay away from toxic dopamine hits.

Living in a reality that deprioritizes toxic dopamine hits, I feel clearer, fulfilled, energized, and inspired. These emotions keep me accountable and consistent and steer me away from reverting to old unhealthy habits.

Questions from the community

Natalia: Did you reduce the porn or completely eliminate it out of your life?

I completely eliminated it back in December 2022. Long story short, I was going through a breakup with Kate and used it as a distraction from dealing with my emotions. Thankfully, we got back together, but during that time, I made a commitment to completely cut out porn and haven't looked at it since.

Wes: How do you replace the mid afternoon munchies?

You might find this amusing, but I actually eat the same meals at roughly the same time every day. I do this for several reasons, but specifically to address your question, Wes, it helps me avoid constant snacking. I prefer to have 4-5 smaller, healthy meals spread throughout the day, which prevents me from giving in to cravings. I also suggest not buying or keeping junk food at home, as this eliminates the temptation to eat it.

Call 2 action

What toxic dopamine hits are leading you to feel empty, unfulfilled, low energy and disappointed?

Identify what they are and then take yourself through the framework we discussed earlier.

Step 1: Identify the Cue

Step 2: Recognize the Craving

Step 3: Isolate the Routine

Step 4: Replace with a Positive Behavior

Step 5: Audit Your Environments

Step 6: Repeat and Reinforce

Let me know how this works out for you, would love to hear some updates.

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